Just in Time for the End of the World

I am pleased to say I have a brand new baby daughter. Darcy Joy Muir is a mighty eight pound addition to my family and, as first impressions go, far less trouble and lower maintenance than her father. She was born at 12.49pm on 11/12/12 (that’s 12/11/12 for American’s). Obviously we were aiming for 12.12pm on 12/12/12 (that’s 12/12/12 for American’s) but there is no scheduling these things and by the looks of her she was ready to get out. I don’t blame her. Thanks to the Mayans Doomsday prophecies, we’re all in a hurry to get things done. The end of the world is nigh….so stock up on beer, baked beans and Tayto party boxes.

Darcy Joy Muir – b. 11/12/12

Don’t Panic. The Mayans have it wrong. The 5,125 year cycle dubbed ‘the long count’ ends on December the 21^st. This is yet another theoretical ‘Doomsday’ and it has already been disproven by Calender-philes everywhere. It seems the Mayans didn’t do leap years. This would mean more than 1000 days were simply discounted during those five millennia. By that logic the cycle that they followed ended more than three years ago. Did anybody notice anything untoward three years ago? The release of Bon Jovi’s The Circle is probably as close to the end of the world as we got that year. In 2010 the terrible remake of Clash of the Titans was screened and here we are still standing. It will take more than that to eradicate the planet. They came close though.

If however December 21^st is the end of the world then I would suggest partying far harder than the night before the Y2K bug came and went. I think Prince sung a song about it. It’s an excuse to start the festive season early. If I do have just seven days to hang out with young Darcy then the first thing to do is have an early Xmas. It may surprise some of you to know I have celebrated ‘Christmas’ early once before.

Years ago when Michael Jackson was the biggest thing in music my mother decided to dispense with Christmas. She decided rather than celebrating the late JC’s birthday we should be following the lead of the Pagan’s and celebrate the Solstice. For us it was the Summer Solstice (Dec 21 in New Zealand). For an eight year old kid this was a promise of seeing my pressie’s four days early. She had no argument from me.  As I looked at the presents beneath that withering sunflower I knew I would be the envy of young fulla’s everywhere as I paraded my gifts days before them. After far too many helpings of festive nutloaf, alfalfa sprouts and more tofu than I could handle, it was off to to show them what they were missing out on. Needless to say it didn’t become an annual event.

If this Christmas has to be moved it can be very easily. The tree is up, the lights are on and in a little over 24-hours there will be five people living at my address. It’s time to party like its 1999.